Wednesday, May 27, 2015

"He That Refraineth His Lips is Wise"

The other day, a few of us were at a birthday party for a young man/friend who was turning 18.  His dear family was hosting a pot-luck at a nearby park, and invited other families and friends to the party.  Only Kyle, Valerie, Brielle and myself were able to attend that night. 

Soon after arriving, one of the dad's that we hadn't met before, said to me, while he was looking at Brielle, "I see you brought your neighbor kid with you."  I was a bit shocked, to say the least! But in an effort to smooth over the awkward moment, I began to explain that we were blessed to be able to adopt her and her brother Benjamin.  He then said, "How's that going for you?"  

Of course, the mama bear in me was getting increasingly agitated, and I hoped to end the conversation as quickly as I could and move along.  My heart ached as I saw our precious bundle-of- blessings-that-God-gifted-us-through-adoption standing there, and thought what if she was old enough to hear and comprehend such thoughts and words?  

As I was mulling this over, it sure reminded me of how we need to be prepared to talk with our precious children about such things, and do all we can to encourage them through these times.

It also sure made me think hard about my words (or lack of encouraging words) and the affect they have on other people. I truly want to speak words of life and encouragement to people!  So first and foremost, I need to continue to fill my heart with the treasure of God's word.  Then, I need to pray daily for the right edifying words, and when I should and shouldn't speak!   There are so many verses on Godly speech in the Bible, but I only have time to list a few!  (We're hosting a birthday party at our house tonight! :-)

"But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart . . . " Matthew 15:18

" For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh. A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things . . . " Matthew 12:34

"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." Prov. 4:23

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."  Philippians 4:8

"Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers."  Ephesians 4:29

"Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing." 1 Thess.
"The words of the godly encourage many . . " Prov. 10:21
"A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver." Prov. 25:11
"In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips is wise." Prov. 10:19 
"Let all that you do be done in love."
1 Co. 15:14


Shiloh said...

What a great reminder, Mrs. Bowes! We've had comments too-- which I could really let bother me. But I'm so Thankful for what the Lord has done in our family with adoption! It is blessing no matter what others say! One funny thing- we've had unfavorable comments from some prior to our children coming home, but now they've changed their perspective. Amazing what God can do!! :) Love you all! ~Shiloh

The Bowes Family said...

Hi Shiloh!
Thanks so much for your comment! It meant a lot to me! It is always such a blessing to have sweet encouragement from other supportive adoptive families. This was the first "negative" type comment I think I have ever received. Everyone we've met, whether out and about or here in our neighborhood, has been very positive and adores the kids. So I think it just really caught me by surprise. I felt like I was prepared for it, but since I haven't experienced any negativity towards our adoptions to test this, and guess I wasn't! :-) I'm not sure why this Christian man would feel this way about adoption. There could be lots of reasons. So, I'll surely not hold a grudge and since we may never see him again, I'll pray that someone else has the opportunity to share the beauty and God's perspective of adoption with him! :-) And you're so right, it doesn't matter at all what others say to us. We shouldn't be easily offended and definitely not hold a grudge. (I do still feel protective of the kids though! Just the mama in me!) And God always uses everything for good, as He did with this situation!

Thanks again!
Mrs. Bowes

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